I have issues

There are paradigms in my life that have been completely changed within the past 10 years. Foundations in my belief system that no longer hold any relevance. The first was drinking. I used to be so against drinking to the point where I would see my dad have a beer, maybe once every 6 months, and feel a little uncomfortable. That didn't change until I was told to put my convictions to the test and understand if it was something I should believe in or if it was just something I was used to believing. Then it was being gay, of which I had to deal with on a much more intimate level. Having to realize that just because cultural/societal rules dictate that my being gay is different (thank god that mentality is changing) doesn't mean that is it necessarily wrong.

However, that is not to suggest that just because I am surrounded by something that I will become accustomed to it and in turn be OK with it. I will never be alright with recreational/casual drug use. I am totally fine with people smoking weed on the occasion but when begins to bring in other drugs and the "occasional" use turns to once or more a week I have big issues. I will never be okay with "hooking up" with someone (although I've been guilty of this myself). I would like to believe that at this point in my life I don't need an anonymous sexual encounter to get through the day. I would like to believe that I can get through the day without a boyfriend or without having food to offset my emotions. Or what I have a big problem with is signing on line and passing the time away with people through the Internet. The fact that you can make an emotional connection with someone but not truly commit to anything, not even the conversation, is almost a relief. When dealing with people there are certain rules of etiquette that have to be followed, but online it's like there's a buffer of space that eliminates certain rules. I love and hate the internet, and now I'm hungry and need to make pizza dough.